Tuesday, March 31, 2009

They say it's final...

We're not going to be able to adopt Olive
Her country's adoption process is not stable enough for them to accept our application to adopt her.

I received wisdom from someone that made a lot of sense to me when I asked, "Where do you go from here?"

"Where from here? You grieve for the child you lost. Most won't understand your grief, but you need to go through it anyway. Find people who will listen to the dreams and plans you had that will go unfulfilled, so you can work through all those feelings. Just like a child you carry becomes a part of your family the moment you find out about him/her, Olive became a part of yours. You made decisions with her in mind; you ordered your days in such a way as to make her a part of them. It doesn't matter if you lose a child at 6 weeks, full term, or to an adoption that doesn't go through, your family will not look like you thought it would, and that hurts immensely. And then, if you can do it, maybe you turn your sights to another child who desperately needs you. Not to replace the baby you lost, but to share the love you have to give with one who needs it. And you pray for Olive--that her country would be open to placements again, and a family would come along who will love her with the love you had to give her and give her a home and a hope for a future."

1 comment:

THE CAMPBELL FAMILY said...

I am so sorry that they won't except you as Olives parents... Adoption is very hard on us. You will be able to move on, it takes a little while.. But maybe Ruslana is meant for you instead.. We never know what God has in store for us. Best wishes to you. If you need to talk you can e-mail me. jngcampbell9@msn.com

Hugs to you ~~ Jody